Now published! Europe, North & West, 3rd book (of 5) in this Stories across Cultures series, joins Africa & Middle East and Asia & Caucasus!

Europe, South & East now in progress, publication date: Wednesday 23 November; the set will conclude with Latin America & Anglo, scheduled for Wednesday 06 December publication!

[excerpted from, 9 Keys to Self-Esteem: Positive Psychology ©2023]

Another key to increased self-esteem is perseverance.

One of those 24 character strengths of positive psychology, perseverance is found in the virtue category of courage. It takes a certain measure of courage to stick to a task rather than abandoning it, continue on when we feel like quitting.

Goal-setting takes courage, too; what if we don’t make it? It’s about setting realistic and achievable goals, however, not too easy (that wouldn’t really be a goal now, would it?) but not too difficult or unrealistic either; to boost our self-esteem, we need a series of wins. Better to set goals that you feel certain you can stick to and achieve, and over time, you’ll naturally see yourself setting slightly more difficult goals without even thinking about it – because you’ve acquired some skill and the new goal now isn’t so difficult after all.

Perseverance itself feeds our self-esteem, not only reaching our goals. When we consistently see things through to their end, we begin to know this about ourselves; when I take on a project or responsibility, I’ll finish it. People can rely on me. I can rely on myself.

Naturally, at times we need to cut our losses and end something. People and things change, our own needs or time constraints change, a host of other circumstances may be different from when you began. There’s no shame in a change of plans. But this is also the call for achievable goals, ones that we’re confident in, short-term, no time for changes.

The more you set and meet goals, the more you’ll realize the pleasure in perseverance – as achievement is the reward, and that feeds the pleasure centers in our brain. 

Along the way, challenges and difficulties will arise, and if you can slay them like the warrior you are, you’ll feel even more confident each time.

I’ve traveled a lot. (More than 100 countries, all solo.) Every trip, each country, involved a great deal of goal-setting, lots of small achievements in an unfamiliar place, some failures (some of those, spectacular) – and a few meltdowns and “whatever am I going to do now???” I allow myself a 5-minute maximum for that meltdown – the emotions are genuine and need to be expressed – and then I calm my mind and ask myself, “how can I solve this?” And I have a new goal before me.

Small rewards act as motivators, allowing us to treat ourselves and getting us to that next sub-goal. For goals have parts, and each part is a smaller goal. Is your goal to write a book? Can you write one chapter per week? Can you write one page today? How about a paragraph, then get yourself a snack?

Perseverance comes in manageable parts. Even if we set realistic, easily attainable goals, there will be some days when we just don’t feel like working toward them. An occasional day like that is fine. Don’t let it become a trend. Instead, ask yourself: what can I manage today? Some days I don’t feel creative, or words won’t come, or I have a headache. So before skipping my writing that day, which might put me behind on an approaching deadline, I ask myself: what does feel manageable? Can I do some of the project’s online research instead? Or create the bibliography? Or just put its form together, chapter headers and that sort of thing? Or think deeply about it, in order to guide its direction when I begin writing again? Manageable parts.

We are always building our own confidence, little successes leading to slightly bigger successes, and so on. And no, self-esteem isn’t self-confidence. But they surely are cousins.

Let’s also talk about grit.

Grit, in psychological terms, is perseverance in the face of challenges (aka, determination), or perseverance plus passion (aka, ambition), and it’s generally seen in working toward long-term goals (Datu, 2021; Schimschal et al., 2021).

Having perseverance gets us to short-term goal achievement and boosts our self-esteem, while its close cousin, grit, allows us to achieve our dreams – and grow our self-esteem even more.

What does the research say?

Perseverance, and its cousin grit, have demonstrated benefit to wellbeing (Disabato et al, 2019; Hou et al., 2022; Jiang et al., 2020), to happiness (Jiang et al.; Kwon, 2021), and to life satisfaction (Clark & Malecki, 2019; Datu et al., 2022; Zhao et al., 2022).

Self-esteem also links to subjective wellbeing (Zhang et al., 2020), while grit and self-esteem have also been directly linked (Weisskirch, 2018).

So, while this area – of perseverance as a direct key to self-esteem – has been understudied, the connection can be made. Our subjective wellbeing, happiness, and life satisfaction all serve to boost self-esteem, and our perseverance and grit contribute to these outcomes.

Then, how do we strengthen our perseverance – and become grittier?

Like any skill or capability, we build small. We gradually increase our goal-setting and our challenges, beginning with those easy to accomplish, in order to build our confidence. Similar to the educational theory of constructivism in which we acquire new knowledge by building onto prior knowledge already firmly grasped, or the theory of scaffolding in which a task is demonstrated or outlined by an instructor and then attempted by the learner with support readily available, we give ourselves some wins – and we build from there.

What feels like something you can accomplish today? The degree of task depends on your strength of perseverance, something only you can determine – but above all, it must feel doable.

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Exercises:

Set one achievable task today, and make certain that you accomplish it. Repeat tomorrow.

Keep a journal of accomplishment. Some days, it may just be that you got out of bed before noon. Or, depending on who you are and the current state of your perseverance, perhaps it’s asking your boss for a raise – or negotiating world peace. (Okay, that last one isn’t easy for anyone. The point is, it’s relevant to your current perseverance strength.) Keeping a record will help you to identify those areas in your life that you hadn’t previously considered in terms of goal-setting and achieving. It will also encourage you, as you watch your journal of accomplishment grow.

Tell someone – a close friend, or your entire Instagram following, depending on the topic – about your goal, how you’re challenging yourself. This holds you more accountable, and encourages you to persevere even if things become difficult. You have a team rooting for you.

What’s one goal you’d like to set but feel is impossible for you to achieve? Want to learn coding – or Sanskrit? Want to improve your singing voice or build your physical strength? Analyze this seemingly impossible area and the steps it would take to get there. Then, ignore all the steps except for the first one. Work only on that. When it feels finished, look then only to the second step. And repeat.

What’s an area in which you normally start and then give up? Where’s your chronic quitting? Do a brainstorming activity on why this is. Write the activity, skill, or whatever it is in the center of a blank page, then fill the page around it, writing as quickly as possible so that the words and ideas flow and your pen outpaces your inner critic, in response to this topic and why it’s been an area of failed prior attempts. What you discover may surprise you.

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References:

Clark KN and Malecki CK (2019). Academic Grit Scale: Psychometric properties and associations with achievement and life satisfaction. Journal of School Psychology 72, 49-66. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jsp.2018.12.001

Datu JAD (2021). Beyond Passion and Perseverance: Review and Future Research Initiatives on the Science of Grit. Front. Psychol. 11:545526. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.545526

Datu JAD, Valdez JPM, McInerney DM et al. (2022). The effects of gratitude and kindness on life satisfaction, positive emotions, negative emotions, and COVID-19 anxiety: An online pilot experimental study. Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being 14:2, 347- 361. https://doi.org/10.1111/aphw.12306

Disabato DJ, Goodman FR, and Kashdan TB (2019). Is grit relevant to well-being and strengths? Evidence across the globe for separating perseverance of effort and consistency of interests. Journal of Personality 87, 194-211. https://doi.org/10.1111/jopy.12382

Hou XL, Becker N, Hu TQ et al. (2022). Do Grittier People Have Greater Subjective Well-Being? A Meta-Analysis. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin 48:12, 1701-1716. https://doi.org/10.1177/01461672211053453

Jiang W, Jiang J, Du X et al. (2020). Striving and happiness: Between- and within-person-level associations among grit, needs satisfaction and subjective well-being.  Journal of Positive Psychology 15:4, 543-555. http://doi.org/10.1080/17439760.2019.1639796

Kwon HW (2021). Are Gritty People Happier than Others?: Evidence from the United States and South Korea. Journal of Happiness Studies 22, 2937-2959. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10902-020-00343-4

Schimschal SE, Visentin D, Kornhaber R et al. (2021). Grit: A Concept Analysis. Issues in Mental Health Nursing 42:5, 495-505. https://doi.org/10.1080/01612840.2020.1814913

Weisskirch RS (2018). Grit, self-esteem, learning strategies and attitudes and estimated and achieved course grades among college students. Current Psychology 37, 21-27. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12144-016-9485-4

Zhang L, Yu Q, Zhang Q et al. (2020). The relationship between explicit self-esteem and subjective well-being: The moderating effect of implicit self-esteem. Journal of General Psychology 147:1, 1-17. https://doi.org/10.1080/00221309.2019.1609896

Zhao Y, Sang B, and Ding C (2022). The roles of emotional intelligence and adversity quotient in life satisfaction. Current Psychology 41, 9063-9072. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12144-021-01398-z

[excerpted from, 9 Keys to Optimism: Positive Psychology ©2023]

Zest. Vitality. Resilience. Thriving. Yes, please.

When you awake in the morning, do you do so easily? Delighted by a new day? Looking forward to what it will bring?

Do others consistently tell you that you have a lot of energy or enthusiasm? Do you feel so?

Are you the type of person who takes on new projects or endeavors wholeheartedly, giving it your all? Do you think of yourself as diligent, a person of dedication and follow-through?

Even when you fail at something (because we all do, at times), are you the sort to ‘pick yourself up, brush yourself off, and try all over again’ – as the old song goes?

Then you, dear reader, are a person of zest.

We all are, in fact, as with all 24 character strengths. It may be under-represented in some, and over-emphasized in others (again, this can be true for any of the 24), but it’s there, nonetheless. Zest doesn’t depend on one’s physical capability or energy, either, but on one’s approach to life. And surely, in the face of depression for example, it may be difficult to access. It may be sleeping. But it’s there, deep within, nonetheless.

Interestingly, this character strength is situated within the ‘courage’ category or virtue. The VIA Institute defines zest as an attitude toward one’s life which includes energy and excitement, a driven, wholehearted approach to life as an adventure. Life satisfaction and engagement, also referred to as ‘flow’ and related closely to creativity, are most strongly associated with this strength, as are physical and mental health.

One’s zest for life, above all other character strengths, appears to be the most predictive for subjective wellbeing, as demonstrated in the recent study by Gander et al. (2022). They found mastery, or self-efficacy, a belief in one’s capability, to be its most important outcome, and that, along with hope and curiosity, it showed function across a multitude of dimensions.

Zest for life enhances pleasure, along with humor and hope (Wagner et al., 2020). It’s been shown to reduce depression, particularly through the mediation of gratitude (Lam, 2021), increase pain tolerance and function in spite of pain (Graziosi et al., 2022), promote wellbeing and prevent burnout among physicians (Kachel et al., 2021), contribute to mental health — most highly when in combination with hope, gratitude, and love (Blasco-Belled, 2022).

So, how can we increase our vitality – our zest for life?

As with any skill or strength, by practice. What in your life makes you feel truly enthusiastic? What’s your passion? Do you have a deep love for animals, for nature, for environmental activism? Are you all about gender equality, or women’s empowerment in the workplace? Do you love to compose music, paint, or write poems? The possibilities are endless. The more zest for life we have, the more of it we deeply love. To access your zest, and to feed and grow it, identify your passion – and do more of that. Then, consider a second one. And a third. Quantity isn’t really the point here – but just one passion can become an obsession, too singular a focus, while if we have 2 or 3 passions in life, we become more enthusiastic overall.

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Exercises:

Contemplate the question, ‘What’s your passion?’ Perhaps meditate on the topic. Then, write in a journal, do a brainstorming or mind-mapping exercise, or discuss with a friend – somehow, externalize it. Just thinking about the things that spark our enthusiasm makes us feel more enthusiastic.

Try to do the thing you’re most passionate about on a very regular basis. If it’s sailing, for example, that might depend on many factors – the weather, larger periods of free time, the season, access to a boat. If so, make a plan for doing that activity at whatever intervals seem realistic – but, regularly. If your passion is something more readily accessible, perhaps do it weekly – or even daily.

What’s something you feel enthusiasm about or deep interest in, but aren’t actually engaging in? Can you find a way to integrate that passion into your life?

When you awake, if you aren’t the type to bounce out of bed, try this: when the alarm goes off, sit up in bed, take a deep and cleansing breath in and out, and say aloud (or in your head, if someone is sleeping next to you!) 3 things you’re looking forward to that day. If a work day and you’re not so enthusiastic about your job, perhaps have a favorite food at lunch, maybe even with a work friend. Maybe it’s a movie you plan to watch that evening. Perhaps the end of the work day itself is one of those things you’re anticipating. (If so, you might want to consider a change in workplace – or another line of work altogether.) Can you come up with 3 things? Every morning? Our lives don’t have to be ideal – one of the things we’re looking forward to might be a sunny day, or seeing springtime flowers.

Cultivate gratitude, and mindfulness (both to appear later in this book). They help to enhance our zest for life – and in turn, optimism.

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References:

Blasco-Belled A (2022). Character strengths and mental health as complex systems: a network analysis to identify bridge strengths. Current Psychology. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12144-022-03598-7

Gander F, Wagner L, Amann L et al. (2022). What are character strengths good for? A daily diary study on character strengths enactment.  Journal of Positive Psychology 17:5, 718-728. https://doi.org/10.1080/17439760.2021.1926532

Graziosi M, Yaden DB, Clifton JDW et al. (2022). A strengths-based approach to chronic pain  Journal of Positive Psychology, 17:3, 400-408. https://doi.org/10.1080/17439760.2020.1858337

Kachel T, Huber A, Strecker C et al. (2021). Reality Meets Belief: A Mixed Methods Study on Character Strengths and Well-Being of Hospital Physicians. Frontiers in Psychology 12:547773. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.547773

Lam KKL (2021). The mediating effect of gratitude in the relationship between zest for life and depression. Personality and Individual Differences 171:110476. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2020.110476

VIA Institute on Character. VIA Character Strengths Survey and Character Reports. Retrieved April 16, 2023, at https://www.viacharacter.org/

Wagner L, Gander F, Proyer RT et al. (2020). Character strengths and PERMA: Investigating the relationships of character strengths with a multidimensional framework of well-Being. Applied Research in Quality of Life 15:2, 307-328. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11482-018-9695-z

[excerpted from, 9 Keys to Creativity: Positive Psychology ©2023]

Our next key to creativity must be flow, and this is an exciting and very rich key indeed. Engagement, as outlined in the PERMA model, refers to our deep connectedness — to a person, place, or object, but most of all, to an activity. The flow state is that deeply connected and rooted experience – so totally absorbed in what we’re doing that we ignore or even forget all else. The activity ‘flows’ through us, time flows around us, we’re in the flow, we’re part of the flow. This isn’t equated to those activities we may dislike; while we can get lost in the work that we’re doing at the office, and suddenly realize it’s 3 hours later, that’s a matter of concentration; however, we don’t necessarily feel that we’re part of the experience and that it’s part of us. Connectedness in addition to concentration is the key to this, well, key.

We’ve all had this experience: so totally engaged in what we’re doing that we ‘lose all track of time.’ This isn’t the same as distraction, such as when we read our social media newsfeeds and suddenly realize that hours have passed. In a sense, yes; we’re fully engaged in what we’re reading. But we’re usually passively, rather than actively, involved.

This is that loss of time because we’re creating something new. Or because our enjoyment of our activity is total. A child becomes so absorbed in what he or she is doing that the mother’s calls go not ignored but unregistered. This is the type of engagement we’re talking about in ‘flow’.

Flow is a liminal state – neither here nor there, but in-between – somewhere between conscious and unconscious states, and not unlike self-hypnosis, trance, or lucid dreaming. We’re drifting, but with a purpose, a finely tuned focus.

As mentioned in our introduction, flow is often compared to being ‘in the zone’, a common sports metaphor (and indeed, in playing a sport, we’re also in a flow state), or the ‘zen’ of Japanese Buddhism (any form of Buddhism in reality, though ‘zen’ is originally a Japanese term), achieved in deep meditation. In the latter state, a common experience is to feel ‘at one’ with everything else in the universe, or that we’ve expanded far beyond our own physical boundaries. If you’ve regularly engaged in a sport, you know what I’m talking about. In team sports particularly, you can’t stop to think about what you’re doing; you simply need to inherently know, a kinesthetic knowledge embedded in your body and separate from your conscious mind, and act instinctively in the moment.

In the study of mystical experience, of keen interest currently due to a resurgence in psychedelic research, this state of consciousness and its nuances are being studied as predictors of therapeutic outcome — that is, these altered states comparable to ‘flow’ may well have a benefit of their own, and/or predict whether the psychedelic or other therapeutic approach will be effective.

That feeling of being ‘at one with’ everything around us is termed ‘ universal interconnectedness’ in psychological research, and the sensation that we’ve expanded beyond our own boundaries, ‘oceanic boundlessness’. In addition, we have ‘ego dissolution’, the sense that I as an individual have (temporarily) ceased to exist.

The artist knows these phenomena intimately. Beyond a complete absorption and resultant loss of time, artists (musicians, composers, writers, or any other creative) report a sense of themselves as a ‘vessel’ — that the creative force flows through them (hence the term), but is not precisely generated by them. The creative as a distinct personality ‘steps aside’, while the creativity itself flows through them and onto the canvas, score, or page.

You, dear reader, may or may not be familiar with this sensation. It may be well known to you — or, if you don’t particularly identify as a creative, you may think it belongs to the realm of innate talent. If religious, one might believe that this is their deity working through them; humanistic psychology, developed in the 1960s and a ‘cousin’ to positive psychology, originally referred to this phenomenon as ‘transcendence’. And if you will recall, ‘transcendence’ was the final virtue in the virtues and characteristics model presented in our introduction, by which we live by a strengths-based approach which allows us a sense of accomplishment, meaning, and purpose.

If there’s anything magical about creativity, it is this: the flow state.

And what does the research say?

Flow is defined by Alameda et al. (2022) as the “subjective experience that people report when task performance is experienced as automatic, intrinsically rewarding, optimal and effortless.” These researchers attempted to determine what’s occurring in the brain when we’re in the flow state, from a neurobiological perspective. They identified structures of attention, in that our focus is solely on our task without distraction; the brain’s reward system, in that we’re given an endocrine response that stimulates pleasure centers of the brain; and, executive function, a skill set of focus, goal-setting, self-regulation, adaptability and flexibility, and related.

Schutte and Malouff (2020) found clear connections between creativity, curiosity, and flow. The greater the curiosity and desire to know and learn, the more creativity increased, which supports the findings of several previous studies. In their research, a flow state was significantly associated with the latter. They propose that this flow state may act as a mediator between the other two variables; that is, while the connection between curiosity and creativity has been established, and the association of flow to the creative act clear, it may well be that curiosity enhances our creativity precisely through this flow state.

Tse et al. (2021) identify the flow state as one of deep engagement and enjoyment, mediating the wellbeing of someone with an autotelic or self-directed personality, that is, one who isn’t easily distracted as their purpose comes from within and is not externally motivated. In other words, the person who does something for the satisfaction it brings them, rather than for the reaction of others, is more likely to engage in the flow state – and more likely to benefit from the wellbeing it brings, through engagement and achievement.

Flow can even be good for planetary health, as proposed by Isham and Jackson (2022), in that it’s a pleasurable state of wellbeing generated by activities of low material requirement (e.g., listening to music, creating art, jogging, writing). Flow is undermined by materialistic values, they conclude, as one’s ability to achieve a flow state is inhibited by both a lack of self-regulation and an evasion of unpleasant issues.

So how can we reach this state of flow, and how can we bring more of it into our daily lives, in order to enhance our creativity?

By now we understand that this flow state, ‘in the zone’ or ‘zen’, is achieved by repetitive yet challenging experiences. Painting, whether art on a canvas or a room in the house, or music, whether composing or just closely listening, are two such ways. Attention and focus are key; hence, exercise such as jogging, or playing a sport, also engender the flow state.

Certain types of meditation can also bring about flow, for meditation is above all a way to train our focus; mindfulness meditation, to be discussed in more detail later on, and in which one focuses on minute details and slow movement, is one such method.

For me, cooking is another; I enjoy a creative, complex, and gourmet style of cooking that keeps my full attention for long periods of time. Yet another for me, it may be apparent, is writing, and whether I’m writing a book or exploring my innermost thoughts in a journal, total absorption describes my mental state.

For each person, the pathways to achieving flow may differ; what they all have in common is pleasure, some measure of challenge (if it’s too easy, we have no need to focus), heightened attention, and a singular focus that simply shuts out all else.

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Exercises:

Identify an activity you love, that’s rhythmic yet also requires your focus, and find your best time of day, for 60-90 minutes once or twice a week, to engage in it. This helps to train your brain for the flow state; eventually, you’re likely to reach a point whereby you can deliberately call forth this state of consciousness without external stimulus. Like anything else, it’s a matter of training.

Play a sport. If you aren’t the team sport type, engage in an exercise routine that challenges you and requires complete focus. Or take up jogging, biking, trekking, swimming, yoga, or weight-lifting. Or go for a brisk walk. (Casual walking, while beneficial for creativity itself, may not require full attention, so for this purpose, brisk, rhythmic walking is more likely to engender flow – though certainly, experiment with both.)

Take up cooking, or baking. Or knitting, or crocheting. Don’t, however, simultaneously listen to a podcast, audiobook, television, or other distraction; instead, give the task your complete and undivided attention. Take up drawing, or learn a new instrument, if so inclined. Engage in gardening. Or reading a book, particularly a novel; we can lose ourselves in story. The book induces a flow state while a film does not; in the former, your brain is completely engaged in creating the visuals to accompany the words.

If you like to write, this is another exercise for increasing flow. In particular, personal writing such as that of a journal is best, for which you don’t need to worry about plot or character development, spelling, or anyone else reading it, for that matter; the last thing you want is for your inner critic to get involved. The personal and private writing, quickly and steadily with minimal pause, allows for flow of your thoughts onto paper as your brain is in a flow state – and what you find there just may surprise you.

The main thing, no matter the activity, is this: let it, and yourself, flow.

References:

Alameda C, Sanabria D, and Ciria LF (2022). The brain in flow: A systematic review on the neural basis of the flow state. Cortex 154, 348-364. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cortex.2022.06.005

Isham A and Jackson T (2022). Finding flow: exploring the potential for sustainable fulfilment. The Lancet Planetary Health, 6:1, e66-e74. https://doi.org/10.1016/S2542-5196(21)00286-2

Schutte NS and Malouff JM (2020). Connections between curiosity, flow and creativity. Personality and Individual Differences 152:109555. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2019.109555

Tse DCK, Nakamura J, and Csíkszentmihályi M (2021). Living well by “flowing’ well: The indirect effect of autotelic personality on well-being through flow experience. Journal of Positive Psychology 16:3, 310-321. https://doi.org/10.1080/17439760.2020.1716055